Peace of Mind

Posted on Sun Jan 3rd, 2021 @ 2:30am by Lieutenant Anna S. Thesia M.D. & Lieutenant Bonnie "Bon-Bon" Durnell

Mission: Healing of Minds
Location: Sickbay

Her slow, meandering path led her from the armory to the medbay painfully slowly. She had been down this road before only to have the doctors tell her ‘it was all in her head’. Some would tell her that there was a mental block causing her to lack confidence, others would write it off as inexperience. None of those ever felt the right case.

She entered sickbay, eyes to the floor, head down low. Walked over to the first bed she bumped into and sat down upon it. And waited.

Alerted by one of the nurses, Anna came out from her office, bearing a mug of hot chocolate as she remembered Bonnie’s preference - how could she not after dressing up for her? “Hey Bonnie, come for the cocoa?” she asked, not seeing anything wrong with her on first glance, and thus handing her the mug.

She autonomically took the offered cocoa. “Sapphire wants you to check my head for something wrong.” She then remembered the prank with the name as she looked up into Anna’s eyes with a small fire, “Which by the way, her name is NOT Ruby, thank you very much for that.” She took a sip from the cocoa and immediately went back to her melancholy demeanor. “Is there something wrong with me?”

“Well, she called me Emerald, so I figured it was fair”, Anna shrugged as she switched on the biobed’s sensors. “Why does she think you need your head examined? Not because you called her by the wrong name, I hope? Ruby would make a great first name for her, on account of her eyes. You must have noticed those eyes, right?”

“No, well I mean yes, but no.” She shook her head. “Might as well call her Diamond to describe the cold personality.” Bonnie half joked. “No, she wanted me to get checked out because, well,” She hid her face behind the cocoa mug. “Because I shot her.” She rolled her eyes. “And I may have shot a hole in the wall, and possibly knocked a bunch of phasers off the wall on my way out, which, that one wasn’t my fault. Not really, maybe, but anyway. That’s why I’m here.”

“On the surface, this sounds like a classic case of morning blues”, Anna said. “And I can see why she’d have a ‘cold personality’ as a result.” She looked at the scans in more detail, not finding anything odd that was medically significant, or anything wrong at all. “Have you slept well, had your morning coffee and all that?”

“Yeah. I slept fine last night. Have already served my shift time. I mean, I don’t like lemon pudding, but who does, right?” She thought about her morning. The sheets were kind to her this morning, as were her pants. Her shift was normal, at least her kind of normal aside from the pudding which was over the top. Then there was the late announcement after her shower which led to her disheveled look and puffy hair. She reached up and checked her hair, yep still sticking up at an odd angle.

“So, what do you think went wrong?” Anna wondered. “You’re a talented and skilled engineer, your posting to this ship is evidence of that.” She couldn’t speak to any more details, as she had no idea how difficult Bonnie’s chosen field was. But she figured Starfleet wouldn’t assign screw-ups to their best ships, not even with the manpower shortage still affecting the organisation as a result of the recent conflict. “I don’t believe you’re just clumsy. People whose work requires precision can’t afford to be.”

Bonnie scrunched up her brows at the term Engineer. For some reason she had never liked the term. She quickly went back to her normal face as she sipped her cocoa. “That’s just it, when I’m working I’m usually fine. I’m good once I’m ‘in-the-zone’ she said as she wiggled back and forth to indicate a different style of being. “I’ve even proven to the Captain that I can be good under pressure, when I have to be. That’s why I invited Sapphire to smack me.” She shrugged. “I thought it would, you know, motivate me.”

Anna snickered. Yes, Bonnie was probably telling the truth, and it might even cost her a lot of courage to do so. But it sounded so funny! “I can see why she sent you here, then. At least, you know, ask her out for dinner, or buy her a ruby necklace, or something like that before you ask her to spank you.”

Bonnie smirked, “Actually she offered to spank me, but we had just met so… well never on the first date, right?” Bonnie sipped some more, the cocoa doing its job to calm her nerves. “She refused anyway, not that smacking me would have really helped. But it was a shot. I thought maybe getting my goat would push me to a point of clarity, or something. Shit, I really don’t know what I was thinking.” She sighed.

“And you’re sure you weren’t thinking with your loins rather than your head?” Anna asked. “I mean, first date or not, I get it. And with her imposing figure, people, including yourself, might lose some confidence, be distracted. I haven’t heard of anyone being distracted to the point of shooting their intended, but there’s a first time for everything.” She paused, then added, “Oh, and first date spankings can be fun. But I’m from Risa, I probably have an entirely different attitude to those things than most people here.”

Bonnie gave her a death stare, “Distracted maybe, attracted nada, no. I was as professional as ever. I try hard not to think with my lady parts, that incident with Cody excluded. And that other thing…” she lost herself in her train of thought involving a certain Lady Godiva on top of a waterhorse. “Anyway. So I trust you can find nothing physically wrong with me, or at least anything you can fix, right?”

“Not on these scans, no”, Anna said. “And if you’re not attracted to her, maybe it’s a general confidence issue? I mean, again, I understand that. I don’t like phasers, or weapons in general, and I’m a horrible shot myself. I’d probably be nervous too. But you’re a smart, talented woman who has done this before. You can do it again. Believe in yourself. It’s the one kind of belief that I can advocate in good conscience.”

“I mean I’m confident in my work. I’m confident in my knowledge, specifically of history and technology. I’m confident in my passion for putting right what once went wrong, but when it comes to my sheets in the morning, they may just be the death of me.” She half smiled. “Maybe you and I could, I don’t know, shoot something sometime. When I’m not intimidated by ole Ruby eyes McSapphire, I mean. We could practice being bad together, or something.” Grasping at straws while weighed down by brinks, she had been in this particular boat before.

“Uhm, sure”, Anna said. “But I’m probably worse than you are.” Maybe that was the confidence boost she needed? Anna wouldn’t even have to pretend she was bad at it. “But let’s do it somewhere safe, where I can’t possibly hit anyone I don’t want to.”

Bonnie could not comprehend someone being worse than she at handling a phaser. “Um, holodeck? Say in two days, when I don’t have a shift and can have plenty of time to wake up and not come unraveled by my sheets?” She punned and then downed the last of her cocoa.

“I can come get you, make sure you’re properly caffeinated, and help you win the battle of the sheets”, Anna offered. “Start your day right.”

Bonnie hopped down off the bed, “Okay, it’s a date.” Then she quickly backpedaled. “But not, like a date date, just a time thing where we shoot the thing. Shit.” She blushed, embarrassed at her own recovery. She then raised her hand, “Okay, bye.” Turned and walked swiftly out before she made everything worse.

Anna laughed as she headed back into her office. Bonnie was nuts, she concluded, but in a fun way.